The Pizza Man
It was a drama filled episode this week for our favorite brothers. Though, isn’t that usually the case? We came closer to retrieving Sammy’s soul, – by trusting a demon . . . again (That’s so wrong) – but were shoved an equal length back. Is there no hope for Sam, after all? Lately, I’ve gown accustomed to New Sam. Yes, I’ve grown accustomed to his face. Yet, I still miss that smiling soul-filled face of yesteryear. Not to mention, we lost a dear friend this week. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry, but I’m going to miss *r*w**y. Let’s all have a moment of silence for our favorite demon. Okay that’s enough. It’s time for your recap and play-by-play. For those who’ve seen Friday’s fantastic episode, onwards and downwards. For all the card-caring demon meatsuits out there who didn’t, SPOILER ALERT!
This week we open with an old friend. Crowley. At least, he used to be an old friend. Now, not so much. He’s making good use of his demon torture skills on his most recent victim. Crowley. Wait. What? Yes. You heard me. Crowley is torturing, Crowley. At least, the shape-shifter version of him. He believes the shifter has more information on the location of Purgatory, but he wont give anything up. After unsuccessfully motivating the shifter – with a pipe to the head – to answer his questions, Crowley set upon using a magic knife to carve the information out of him. Didn’t work. His next attempt was to bargain. If the shifter drew him a map of Purgatory, he wouldn’t kill the several shifter babies in the nursery. The shifter wouldn’t budge, so Crowley sliced his (And his?) head off. “Kinda guess I lost my head.”
At an undisclosed location, Sam and Dean unloaded a Rugaru alpha and placed him in the careful hands (Ha!) of a couple of Crowley’s lackeys. Dean got into it with one of the demon extras, knowing full well that Crowley wasn’t holding up his end of the deal. After a few one-liners, Dean accepted defeat (What? Never) and the two brothers headed back to their hideout. Once again, Dean was horrified at what they were doing. Working for demons? Unacceptable. Yet, it’s the only way they can get Sam’s soul back – at least that’s how Sam reasoned with Dean into accepting the circumstances.
Dean grabbed a drink and proceeded to continue their conversation, but when he turned around, Sam was gone. Suspecting something was amiss (Of course, it is), Dean pulled out his gun. Looking around, he found Sam lying on the floor, knocked out. Before he could do anything, he got a nice clunk on the head as well (Crap). The boys awoke, tied up, and found a familiar face. Why it’s that demon bitch, Meg – version 2 (What? No!). She wanted info on Crowley’s location. Awkward come-on’s and kinky threats abundant, Meg’s tried to get the boys to spill. Before things could go too far, Sam figured out the real reason for the demonic witch visit. She’s running. Since Crowley’s become King of Hell, her home hasn’t been quite the same – since Crowley has put a APB on all Lucifer loyalists – and she intends to put it back the way it was, by killing Crowley. Meg needed the boys help, so Sam made a deal. They’ll help her get to Crowley, as long as they have a few special moments with him first.
It’s safe to say, that Dean was more than pissed. After all, Meg killed Ellen and Jo. Plus, all the other times she screwed them over. How could they possibly trust her? They couldn’t, of course. So Sam promised Dean that it wouldn’t happen. They’ll take a knife to her back, before she can stick one in there’s. And they’ll have some insurance. A trench coat backup (Yay!).
Enter our winged friend, Castiel. Sam prayed and coerced him into believing that the brothers found a holy relic (The Arc of the Covenant? Melted faces? Sounds like a movie to me), making the reluctant angel appear immediately. Cas continued to protest to his time away from the war upstairs, but Sam couldn’t give a crap. He was done with the angel’s complaining. “If you don’t help us, I will hunt you down and kill you.” Cas tried to step up to New Sam’s threats, but gave in. We know there is no way that Cas could be afraid of Sam, so why did he agree to help if he had such problems upstairs? Sympathy? Frustration? Loyalty? You decide.
Later, the boys found themselves at Camp Campbell, after Castiel’s failed attempt to track the demon. Grandpa Samuel was their only link. They searched Grandpa’s office for clues, but only found Grandpa. But, he wouldn’t give them the information they needed, prompting Dean to ask what exactly Crowley had on him. And it was what we suspected all along, Mary. Crowley promised to bring Mary back in exchange for Grandpa’s services. Dean warned Gramp’s to stop the deal. The brothers know all too well what can happen, trying to bring back someone you love from the dead. Dean wanted Grandpa to learn from their mistakes. Grandpa Campbell didn’t listen. He refused.
Immediately, the mood changed. Castiel sat in front of the television set. You could hear the bow-chicka-wow-wow music play in the background. Castiel was watching porn (Oh. My). “If the Pizza Man truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear?” Cue me laughing and falling onto the floor. Sam and Dean’s faces were priceless. Can someone say, uncomfortable? Dean tried to teach Cas some porn etiquette, stating that dude’s don’t watch porn with other dude’s in the room. SLAP! And you don’t talk about it. SLAP! “Turn it off.” But it’s too late. Cas look’s down. Uh. Oh. Wouldn’t this be a great time for Grandpa Campbell to walk into the room? Yes, it would. Cue Grandpa. He tells them that he’s changed his mind. He gives up the location of Crowley’s torture hut.
The boy’s, Castiel, Meg, and her three lackey’s – Wait. Two. Sam was a little knife happy – begin to prepare for battle, when Cas takes Dean aside to voice his concerns. He isn’t sure that getting Sam’s soul back is the best idea. Cas tells him that Sam’s soul has been in Lucifer’s cage for over a year. Basically, Micheal and Lucifer have been using Sam’s soul as a chew toy (Not. Good). He fears that the soul is damaged. And if they put back that damaged soul into Sam’s body, fear the worst. Now is the point, where I think that Sam may never get his soul back. Could next season be a journey to teach Sam how to be a real boy again? Who knows? Do you have a theory?
Dean tries to process this, but in all his Dean fashion, refuses to believe the worst. I think he’s trying to deny even the thought that Sam couldn’t be whole again. The idea just doesn’t process with him. He has to hope. Dean leaves the room, just as we see Sam listening in on the conversation.
At Crowley’s Monster Storage and Torture Center, the team had a little run-in with the guards. Hell Hounds. The two remaining lackey’s were easily taken care of, before the team could temporarily guard themselves behind a door. After finding out she couldn’t escape her meatsuit, Meg kindly volunteered to keep the hounds away, while the boy’s searched for Crowley. Knowing she might not come out of the fight alive, Meg grabbed Cas by the trench and shoved her tongue down his throat (That’s disgusting, but what a lucky demon bitch). And did I see a little inappropriate touching? The electricity in the room must have been too overwhelming for them, because Cas returned the favor with an even more powerful make-out session. Unfortunately, for Mr. Angel (Isn’t this his first kiss?) the kiss was cut short by lack of time before the hell hounds chewed on their rears, and by Sam and Deans awkward stares.
Cas couldn’t shine in his post-kiss glow for very long, seeing as Grandpa Samuel sent him back to Heaven with a one-way non-stop ticket. The brothers realized they had been set up. And you wonder why I hate Grandpa Campbell so much? Here’s you evidence. Crowley had his goons take Sam and Dean to separate monster prison cells, while Meg killed the hounds. Enter still demonic Christian Campbell (I thought we were rid of him) taking Meg for a little slice and dice session reminiscent of the Ruby days (Don’t say that name here). He tried to get her to spill Sam and Dean’s plan, but she held. I guess her own selfish reasons to kill Crowley are enough to keep quiet on the boys plan. Who would have thought?
Meanwhile, Grandpa Samuel paid a visit to Dean in his cell. Longing for forgiveness from his grandson’s, all he got was what we’ve wanted all along. A death threat from Dean. “I’ll make it out of here, trust me, and the next time you see me, I’ll be there to kill you.” Yay, Dean! Here’s hoping that day comes sooner, rather than, later. Immediately, after Dean made his threat, Crowley’s goons came to collect him for supper. Well, for demon supper. And Sam had some, um, desert? He took a nice chunk of himself and bit. This scared me. This scared me, a lot. At first, I was confused. I thought that Sam was drinking his blood, because it was demon blood – to make himself stronger. I was so glad, I was wrong. Sam had made a good-sized demon trap for the goons. He then made his way to save his brother from becoming a late night snack (Thank goodness). Together the brother saved Meg from Christian with one swift knife thrust (Bye. Bye).
The brothers trapped Crowley and the showdown began. Crowley admitted that he, in fact, could not get Sam’s soul back (Should I have seen this coming?). Sam deemed Crowley useless, under Dean’s reservations, and let Meg have her way with him. Only, Cas was there to do the job. A light to a bag of bones, and sadly Crowley was gone. He may have been a real jerk this season, but he was still the same sarcastic, charming demon from Season 5 that we all love. You, Sir, shall be missed.
The final moments began, as Meg flew the coop before Dean could kill her too. Cas rightfully admitted that he was having a hard time upstairs, in fact, he wishes that he could be down on earth with boys instead (Awww). He even promised Sam that they would find another way to get his soul back (Anyone else think, that Cas was actually promising Dean the return of Sam’s soul, not Sam?). Dean reassured Sam that indeed they would get his soul back, but Sam doesn’t want it back, anymore (What? No!). He heard the conversation between Dean and Cas, and doesn’t want to become a damaged mess. “I don’t want it back.” Sam walks away. HE WALKS AWAY! Sam walks away. No matter how many times it happens, I can’t stand to see that boy walk away. We’ve learned by now that it’s never a permanent situation, but that doesn’t mean it still doesn’t hurt. Sam gives up. He gives up on his brother. Though, this time, Sam is giving up on himself. Dean has the ultimate faith in his brother to overcome all obstacles. But I think that this is one obstacle that Sam can’t face, let alone, won’t. Asking Sam to take back that damaged soul is too much to ask, even for Dean. It’s. Too. Much.
Best lines of the night:
1. Crowley (To shifter Crowley): “Sorry, but your exceptional good looks aren’t gonna buy you any mercy.”
2. Dean: “The only thing that’s really changed, is now I need a daily rape shower.”
3. Sam: “I can’t believe you fell for that. That was the plot of Raiders, idiot.”
4. Cas (On porn) “We’re not supposed to talk about it.”
Do you think it was Busty Asian Beauties, or Casa Erotica?
5. Meg (Trying to leave meatsuit): “Seacrest, out.”
6. Cas: “I learned that from the Pizza Man.”
#1, 478, 290 why we love Castiel
7. Dean: “All right. All right. Shawshank is a great flick, but let’s skip the shower scene.”
8. Dean: “I was going to kill her, too. Of course, I would have given you an hour with her first.”
Cas: “Why would I want that?”
What did you think of the episode, dear readers? Will the brothers continue on the hunt for Sam’s soul? Where did Sam go? Did you like the return of Meg? Will Dean ever be happy? Will Cas ever get ‘some’? Tell me in the comments!