The Ultimate Weapon: Part 1 – The Human Connection

We’ve all been hoping The Vampire Diaries would up their game, with only three episodes left in the season. Today, I’m happy to say, they’ve done just that. This rather eventful episode may not of had very many of our favorite WTF? moments, but the ones that were presented had the ability to make us point, yell, and throw chairs in succession. After last week’s cliffhanger, two character reunions, and the Damon & Elena fiasco (I’m still mad at you, Elena. How hard is it to choose between the really, really good-looking vampire, and the other really, really good-looking vampire?), we were treated to an episode that held even more drama, relationship and otherwise. It was a defining moment for one of our characters – his unsteady journey catapulting him into the unknown. This one event, creating a potentially catastrophic series of events we can not even begin to imagine. In the meantime, some of our favorite couples came closer together, finding strength through tragedy – one couple reconnecting for the first time since their shocking breakup. The episode set the pace for the two remaining chapters of the season. If Friday night’s episode was an indication of things to come, we are certainly in for a wild ride. For those who have seen the episode, get comfy, we’ll be recapping this episode in just a moment. The rest of you, watch out. This is a SPOILER ALERT!

Klaus, baby. Sweetheart. Lovah. That’s such a beautiful painting. You’ve got some real talent, there. You know . . . if you ever needed some extra money or anything – I don’t know – maybe you could come over to my place and . . . Ahem! Oh. Sorry. Excuse me. Where were we? Okay. “Rebecca” interrupts her big brother’s art session – he’s so calm, yet the paining is so angry – to hand over the last white oak stake, which Crazy Alaric had hidden. Our favorite hybrid throws the stake into the fire, letting “Rebecca” know they’ll be leaving Mystic Falls in the morning. The Original starts to protest. After all, they just have to go to the Decade Dance. It would be rude to do all that hard work and not show up. Besides, Caroline will be there. Klaus tries to write off his feelings for the blonde vampire, but he should know, he can’t hide his true feelings from us. Stow that pout for some other time, “Rebecca.” He’ll be there at eight.

News Flash! Alaric is still crazy. After lying to Damon about taking those magic herbs Bonnie subscribed, Crazy Alaric meets up with “Rebecca.” Or as she likes to be called, Esther. Mommy Dearest, using the body of her vampire daughter, starts to put her “big plans” in motion. First and foremost, she needs her original body back. With one of those special daggers, a good helping of white oak ash, Rebecca is – once again – out for the count. Bye, Rebecca.

Meanwhile, the final preparations for the Decade Dance are coming together quite nicely. The only thing missing is Elena’s date. Which, considering her current romantic predicament, is quite disturbing. In true Caroline Forbes style, Vampire Barbie has some pretty opinionated suggestions for her best friend. Who does she want Elena to ask to the dance? Why, non other than Stefan Salvatore, of course. “I can’t ask him out on a date. I just made out with his brother.” At least someone is thinking straight. Caroline urges the human to play everyone’s favorite game: Salvatore Swap. “It is Stefan’s turn,“ she argues. He’s Elena’s Epic Love. He deserves another chance.

Now, calm down all you Delena shippers. It’s going to be okay. Not really. Elena calls her former vampire lover hoping the two can once again reconnect – asking him to the Decade Dance. I don’t know about you, but it was hard not to sigh in glee as Stefan brought out that sweet little smile when he said, “Yes,” to Elena’s invitation. No matter how much we want Damon and Elena to finally release all that sexual tension – together – you have to admit, Stefan and Elena are adorable as a couple. Hey, stop throwing things at me! I take it back! I take it back! Not really. Ouch!

When we catch up with Esther and Crazy Alaric again, they’re just entering the Salvatore Tomb. With the real last white oak stake (Yes. The other was a fake) in hand, Mommy Dearest plans her revenge. In order to kill all her children, she will need the protective magic in Crazy Alaric’s ring to bind with the stake – creating an indestructible weapon. Huh. Clever. She holds out her hand, and without hesitation, Crazy Alaric gives her the ring. This is not going to end well. They now have a weapon.

I guess it must be pretty nice having a hundred-year-old vampire around. Where else would they get such nice, seemingly authentic flapper costumes from? Golly, Stelena. It’s just like the old days. Gah! These two are really melting my heart. Leave it to Stefan, though, to remind Elena they don’t have the best track record when it comes to school dances. I have a feeling that’s not going to change.

Despite Tyler’s jealousy over Klaus and Caroline’s concern for Matt, everyone seems to be having a nice time; even Boring Bonnie and her date: Jamie, her vampire mother’s former ward. I’m just going to ignore the fact – like Stefan – that Elena tries to tell the vampire about her recent motel rendezvous with Damon. After all, no one could be that stupid. Ahem! Pardon me. Oh, Damon. You always have to ruin the fun, don’t you?

We have a problem. Crazy Alaric? Yes. Wait. No, it’s Esther. In all her cold-hearted glory, Mommy Dearest shows up at the dance, requiring Elena to follow her to the Salvatore Tomb, under the guise of helping Alaric. Elena willingly trails behind. I have a feeling Damon’s incredibly stupid idea of killing Ric out of mercy had something to do with that. When Damon and Stefan try to catch up with her, they hit an invisible wall. Literally. A spell holds them to Mystic High. Elena’s all on her own.

Klaus, baby. Sweetheart. Lovah. While his white suit makes him look old and creepy, Klaus still pulls out the charm, asking Caroline for a dance. She refuses (Don’t resist it, Caroline), but Klaus uses his sire bond with Tyler – who was faking it – to kick her stubbornness in the ass. Look at the smirk, Caroline. How can you put up such a bitchy attitude with him? He’s adorable! Aw, you hurt his feelings. Now he’s going to be cranky the rest of the night. Thanks a lot, Caroline.

Whoa! Bonnie, keep it in your pants. Damon interrupts the witch and her boy-toy in a steamy make out session – hoping she can break the spell that is keeping them trapped. Even Klaus’ usual death threats aren’t enough for the spell to work. Esther is keeping her out. Told you he’d be cranky, Caroline.

While the others are just sitting and waiting, let’s find out what Esther’s plan for Alaric is. “I’m going to remake him. Make him strong. Fast. Indestructible.” Wow. Way to push all the suspense out of the room. You can’t just shout a thing like that out. You have to build up the mystery. You have to . . Wait. Um . . . what? You’re going to make Crazy Alaric into a vampire? A vampire-hating vampire? That is just messed up.

Esther also let’s us in on another secret: Every time Alaric died, he went over the other side. In that short period of time, Esther was there, speaking to him – helping him recognize his dark side. Oh. Shite.

A few magic words, some stolen blood from Elena, and Crazy Alaric is ready for his transition. One last thing . . . Esther stabs Crazy Alaric with the white oak stake. What? It doesn’t work, unless he’s dead. Elena removes the weapon as Mommy Dearest begins her monologue. Alaric won’t be like her other vampire children. He has enough power. He will rid the earth of vampires once and for all. Isn’t that what Elena wants? No. Not really.

What? You’re just leaving, Esther? Oh. Hi, Matt. Hi, Jeremy. The two humans stall the Original Witch, threatening her life with a shotgun and a crossbow. Puny, Humans. Like that’s going to work. Esther uses her magic to take hold of the humans, forcing them to point their weapons at one another. No. No. No. Esther, stop! Why, thank you, Crazy Alaric. Huh? Taking the white oak stake, Crazy Alaric stabs Esther, literally, in the back. “What happened?” Crazy Alaric doesn’t remember anything. Do you know what this means? No. What? Alaric is back. He never went anywhere. No! Alaric, the non-crazy, non-vampire-hating, Alaric. Hell, yes!

There’s one more thing we can try. What’s that, Bonnie? The witch tries to find Elena with a locator spell, but it’s Klaus’ knowledge of his mother’s usual hangouts that tell them where to find the trio. Well, that doesn’t do much good if they can’t leave the perimeter. It’s okay! What? They’re free to leave. Bonnie breaks the boundary spell, and breaks down in the process. Jamie is there to comfort her, but something is still wrong in the Bennett house.

WARNING: Tissue Alert! In the most heartbreaking scene of the night, Alaric tells his family that he will not be making the transition into a vampire. Oh, damn. Jeremy’s heartsick over Alaric’s decision, but reluctantly understands. It’s the only option. It’s the right thing to do. Jeremy and Alaric hug it out. Elena begins to take the blame for Alaric’s trouble, but he protests. “Taking care of you and Jeremy has been the closest I’ve ever gotten to the life I’ve always wanted.” I will not cry. I will not cry. Dammit! I’m crying. When Alaric steps out into the moonlight one last time, he is brought to tears by his friends and family ready to say their goodbyes. Stefan. Caroline and Tyler. Dr. Fell. It is a fitting farewell to Mr. Saltzman. In the end, Damon is the one by his side. Friends forever, Damon and Alaric share one more moment together before it’s all over. Alaric falls asleep, never to wake up again.

Okay. I slightly hate you right now, TVD. How could you do this to me? I’m going to need some time to get over this. You can’t just kill off one of the best characters on the show and expect me to be all right with it. Please. Leave me alone. I need to grieve in peace – writing Alaric/Damon, Alaric/Elena fan fiction. It’s the only way.

Bonnie? Bonnie, what are you doing here? What’s with that weird look in your eye? Don’t hurt Damon! Witch. I think you’re possessed. Bonnie cuts her palm, letting the blood flow, forcing Alaric to drink. Oh, thank goodness. He slips out of his unconscious state, slowly drinking the blood being offered to him. Whoa, there. It’s not polite to bite the neck that feeds you, Alaric. Alaric? Oops. I mean, Vampire Alaric? Oh, TVD. You are such a cliffie bitch.

The Vampire Diaries

What did you think of the episode? What was your favorite scene? Favorite line? What did you think of Stefan and Elena reconnecting? Did you like the Alaric twist? How will Vampire Alaric affect Mystic Falls? What will he do? Will Esther come back? What did you think of Klaus’ speech to his mother? Will Klaus ever get the girl? What did you think of the cliffhanger? Will Damon fight for Elena? Tell me in the comments!

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