All the Eclipse excitement is over so let’s talk Breaking Dawn

Oh, Summit. You have no idea what you’re doing, do you?

Breaking Dawn in 3D? Shooting in Louisiana & Vancouver? Bill Condon (I think we should call him Beeeell. It just seems right, doesn’t it?)?

Seriously? I just don’t know where to begin with you. First, that crazy Cathi Hardi, then a gray *@#^/# Volvo, and those wigs?

Isn’t there anything you can do right?

“Yes!!! Yes we can!!! (This is what I’m imaging the Summit exec’s saying. We all know they don’t listen. Bad exec’s. Bad.)“

Well, let me give you a little hint . . . FOLLOW THE BOOK! I really don’t think I need to say more than that. It’s not that hard.

Fine. Alright, since you keep pestering me (*Wink*).

Let’s break down the 10 things that HAVE to be in Breaking Dawn:

1. Opening sequence or Bella and the Car: There is nothing that I want to see in the first 30 seconds other than Bella and her new shiny tank of a car. This will give you an opportunity to show that Jacob ran away after Eclipse (You failed to include that in the last movie, FYI).

Going past Newton Outfitter’s (You forgot that too) Bella will see the “Have you seen this boy” flyer and get all teary eyed. This will also be a good opportunity to show what happened when Bella and Edward told Charlie about their engagement, via flashback.

You can find this beginning on page 1 of your instruction manual (a.k.a Breaking Dawn: the book)

2. The Wedding: I want lots and lots of Bella and Alice time here. I want the wedding to take place in the house, the reception – outside (No changing this, because you messed up with the teeny tiny house in the first movie).

Bella needs to smile (She is getting married, after all. To Edward). I want this to be a happy occasion, no Bella inner-monologue crap.

Also, Bella can not let go of Edward. If you look in your instruction manual, you will see that Bella still does not believe that any of this is real. She needs Edward to keep her sane.

Last, but not least, Jacob. Edward needs to take Bella (during the reception) to see Jacob. They need to dance. They need to say goodbye. ‘Nuff said.

3. Isle Esme: Edward can not tell Bella where they are going. It must look like it took them a long time to get there. Both must look nervous. Then, naked swim in the water (Why do I really want this to be an R movie?).

Of course, the most important thing: Feathers. Broken headboard. Bruises. Sex hair. If you forget this, I swear by the millions of FanGirls –  You. Will. Pay (They most likely wont forget, because they want to continue those pesky rumors, *cough*).

Do I really need to go into the rest? Edward resists Bella’s needs (Ha). Lot’s of distraction. Blue Room (More feathers and bruising, please). Tampon check. Oops! Bella calls Rosalie.

4. Lot’s of Wolfy things: This all needs to be from Jacob‘s POV. Got it?

We need funny, sarcastic, irritated, and mean Jacob (You’d better bring it TayTay). There has to be a full understanding of how that wolf telepathy works (Again, you didn’t explain or show this). And Imprinting (That info might come in handy later).

Now, pay attention, because this is a must. Jacob must have empathy for Edward. We need to see how this Bella cradling a demon child is hurting Edward (I have no doubt that RPattz can portray this Edward). Jacob must start to like Edward.

Then, we need to see how Seth (Love ya kid) looks up to Jacob. This will be helpful when you show the separation of the packs. Speaking of which: I will require lots of Leah and Jacob tension (This is for all you Jacob and Leah shippers). I want the agreement between The Cullen’s (Will you be my family?) and Jacob‘s pack. The running around the Cullen property. The Seth and Bella relationship.

Basically, I want it all.

5. The Birth: Bella needs to look sickly. Jacob and Rosalie tension. Edward dying inside. Bella defending Rosalie. Bella wanting blood.

Now, I’m going into specifics here, because if it doesn’t happen this way, it’s going to be crap (Hello! Melissa Rosenberg). Okay?

Bella needs to be laying on the couch, then Rosalie wants her to do one thing or another. Bella gets up with cup o’ blood in hand. She drops the blood and tries to pick it up. SNAP! Jacob and Edward race her upstairs, where Carlisle has medical things.

Jacob and Edward try to save her. Jacob is freaking out as Edward rips into Bella’s stomach with his teeth (Cue the GORE). Then, as she lay dying, Edward injects Bella with needles filled with his venom. Edward is sure it will work (But he is mostly freaking out), Jacob is sure that she is dead. He goes downstairs where he looks into another room (This could be Jacob inner-monologue time). He smiles.

FADE TO BLACK

And that concludes Part 1 of Breaking Dawn the movie and part 1 of my post. Check back tomorrow for part 2.

See you tomorrow!  – Kim

What do you think needs to be in Breaking Dawn: The Movie? Do you think we should see Renesmee in part 1 or 2? Tell me in the comments!

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