Klaus Mikelson & A Series of Unfortunate Events

After watching last night’s mid-season finale of The Vampire Diaries, it’s clear our favorite show has lost the spark it once had, though it may be hard to admit. In fact, even I’m still living in denial. However, there is hope. You know there is. And it resides in the one person whom you’d least expect: Klaus. He’s the terror of the town, usually setting off on a rampage of the nefarious kind, but last night proved he is so much more. He may have killed a whole bunch of people, but those few minutes we spent with him were some of the most exciting and shocking moments we’ve seen in a long time. Joseph Morgan, you are our hero. I’m not saying that because I have a crush on you or anything. Cough. But because you’ve earned it. You distracted me enough to forget about that Damon and Elena drama. Almost. You made me forget about Jeremy and those ridiculously obvious plot holes, and you even managed to make me cry with your heartbreaking monologue to Stefan. It was just another holiday for the people in Mystic Falls, but you, Sir, made it truly electrifying. I just hope Tyler takes it easy on Klaus. That’s one cliffhanger we didn’t see coming.

Revelation

So, Damon. How did that whole ‘break Elena’s sire bond’ thing go last night? I know it was difficult, but it was for the best. You deserve so much more than what she was willing to give; not having to constantly wonder if your girlfriend is with you because she truly loves you, or because you share some kind of rare, freaky vampire to vampire attachment. She’s not worthy of you, Damon; always flipping between love and hate, Stefan and you. Aren’t you sick of it? It’s time for you to move on, Buddy. Find someone who loves you for you, and is not subconsciously required to cater to your every need. Elena is such a whiney brat, anyway. ‘I don’t wanna be a vampire.’ ‘I don’t’. . . Oh. Hi. I didn’t see you there, Elena. Damon, what is she doing here?

Though we figured as much, Damon hadn’t the heart to break his bond with Elena, instead opting to help her and Bonnie find a way for Jeremy (who has buffed up considerably. Look at those muscles!) to be around vampires again – without the need to brutally wound each one. However, Elena decides to invite an unwanted guest – at least by Damon standards. Creepy Professor Shane uses his hypnosis skills – he’s very well-rounded for a teacher – to allow Jeremy to bypass his hunter compulsion and not freak out every time he see’s Elena. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work, bringing out Elena’s guilt. Damon tries to comfort her, but Elena only manages to throw her sire bond ways in his face. Uncomfortable with the situation, Damon tries in his own way to help Jeremy, telling him to redirect his fuzzy lovey feelings to Bonnie, somehow suppressing the hunter inside. Yes. I’m confused too. Surprisingly (or not, the writers have become a little lackadaisical concerning plot lines lately), it works. Jeremy is cured. Elena and him are friends again. Everything is working out pretty well. Of course, this is probably going to all blow up in their faces, but we’ll let them have this one for the time being.

Now that’s taken care of, Damon ponders the notion as to why he hasn’t killed Creepy Professor Shane. It’s a question we all have, but Shane – in a rather random conversation – tells us why. He knows the location of the cure. You know, the cure. His previous tale about Silas – the man who loved then lost – comes back into play. Silas, after creating an immortality spell, loses his one love, therefore creating a cure for his lonely destined forever, eventually to be buried alive by his best friend. You find Silas, you find the cure. Unsurprisingly, it’s not as simple as that. They need the completed hunter’s mark, not for the map, but for the spell that is woven beside it. It’s the only way to summon Silas and the cure. Which means it’s time for Jeremy to kill some vampires . . . just not our vampires.

Revolution

Over at the Mikelson Mansion, Klaus – in between back stabbing his siblings and ordering his hybrid lackey’s around – finds the time to fit in a little bit of artistic amusement in his busy schedule. I’m only kidding, Klaus. You know you’re my favorite. Stefan, ever the curious one, wonders why Klaus is making “postmodern snowflakes” when he should be out finding the Hunter’s Sword. Never to be outdone, Klaus tells Stefan he’s had the sword for a long while now, kept safe and hidden in a dime store safe that any vampire, werewolf, or crowbar-wielding citizen could open.

Meanwhile, with twelve un-sired, cranky, bitchy hybrids at his disposal, Tyler details his ill-structured plans of mutiny to Caroline. He tells her tonight’s the night Klaus is finally going down, reiterating how important this singular opportunity is to keep his fellow hybrids safe. The thing is, there’s going to have to be some compromises made. Having secured a witch for their disposal, Tyler lets it be known that their plan is to reintroduce the body jump spell – effectively removing Klaus from his meat suit, putting him into someone else’s body and encasing him in concrete. Now, don’t get me wrong, Tyler. For having such a short scheming period, the plan is so-so. I suggest you watch TrueBlood to figure out the many ways that this plan could go wrong. But where are you going to find a volunteer to willingly give you his body? “I’m going to do it.” Um, say what?

Given that they all need Klaus to find the cure and everything, Caroline makes a point to tell Stefan the situation, ordering him to find the map-decoding Hunter’s Sword ASAP. In the meantime, Caroline will distract Klaus, as is usual. Though she may be fighting it, it’s hard for Caroline to ignore that signature Klaus smile and charm, slowly and reluctantly letting him in (kinda). It all seems for not, though, as Stefan is unable to find the sword. When he finds Caroline sometime later, Alpha Tyler & Friends make it a point to keep the two from lousing up their future plans, keeping them under heavy guard in the Lockwood Cellar. Soon left with no need for the sword – thanks to Creepy Professor Shane – a freed Caroline tells Tyler there’s no need for him to sacrifice himself, she has a better idea. Remember Rebecca? She’s just lying around, not doing anything, being daggerd and all, so why not use her? They just killed two Originals with one stone. Suspiciously, this does not sit well with Haley and Professor Shane’s plan – though we never really find out why. Haley breaks Caroline’s neck, ensuring her involvement is at a minimum. When April Young finds Caroline unconscious and then not, Caroline – not knowing of April’s vervain bracelet – compels Miss Mystic to forget, creating an even bigger mess than before. Oh, wait. Nevermind. NOW it’s a bigger mess than before. Haley tells Tyler that there is no witch waiting to help them. It was all a ruse. She was staging a coup. “I needed the twelve. I needed them for the sacrifice!”

Retaliation

They don’t see him watching, waiting. They’re too oblivious with their own concerns – their mutiny – to understand what’s really going on.

He can hear their blood pounding, flowing through their veins. He can taste it on his tongue, feel it as the warm rush drips down his throat. It will be easy to kill them, but it will be such a waste. It took so much of his power, his energy, to create them, to give them life. But it has to be done. They betrayed him. They broke their chains as if they meant nothing. They are nothing. He is the first; the Original. They should worship him like the God he is.

The only sounds he hears are the screams. Blood is everywhere, down his arms, his shirt, his face. He rips their hearts out one by one. Twelve hearts. Twelve dead souls at his feet.

He never intended for this to happen. They were supposed to be his friends, his family, the only ones he could ever rely on and trust. That’s all over now. What does he have left? Who does he have left?

Tyler. It’s all Tyler’s fault. He should make him suffer like the dog he is.

He knows what he has to do.

She doesn’t see him approach. She doesn’t realize what’s about to happen. He grips her neck, plunging her shocked expression into the cool water. She fights, but it’s no use. Her breath leaves her body and she succumbs to the darkness. Carol Lockwood is dead.

Reawakening

So, Damon. Do you understand? Do you see how this so-called “relationship” you have with Elena is nothing but a lie? She may have feelings for you, but this – whatever it is – isn’t healthy. Even though she’s acted like her usual self this whole time, with the exception of this episode, you know she’s a different person when she’s around you. You have to let her go. You have to set her free. I can’t watch you and your sad panda face anymore, moping around, feeling guilty for sexing up Elena when she’s sired to you. Stop fighting it, Damon. She’s . . .

Yeah, I get the gist of it. Blah, blah, blah. I have to let Elena go. Can you shut up now?

Sorry.

In a rather ordinary moment – not overtly emotional – Damon finally sets Elena free.

“I was ready to fight you on this, but suddenly every part of my body is telling me to get in this car and leave you.”

“So do it.”

The Vampire Diaries

NO. Don’t do it, Elena. Are you crazy? Fight. Fight for Damon. You know you really love him. It’s not some stupid sire bond crap mumbo jumbo. Elena! Listen to me, young lady. I’m not going through another failed attempt between you two knuckle heads again. You two love each other. That’s all there is to it, Elena. Elena? Oh, well. So much for that. Anyhoo, anyone else wondering how April found the Lockwood Cellar?

The Vampire Diaries (This is the end. For real this time)

Best Lines of the Night:

1. Damon: “This would be so much more fun if we were naked.”

2. Damon: “I wanna throw you back in my bed and never let you leave.” (YES! PLEASE)

3. Caroline: “If I’m going to be a friend in your time of need, then you’re going to need to work on your punctuality.”

4. Caroline: “My boyfriend is a dumbass martyr.”

5. Caroline (to Klaus): “Here to steal Tiny Tim’s crutches?”

6. Damon: “Bonnie’s enlisted Dr. Evil in her plan and I have to thwart him.”

7. Klaus: “You’ve been dodgy and Caroline’s been lovely. Which I’ve come to recognized as a tool of distraction. Now, do you have something to share with me?”

8. Klaus: “What do you want from me? A secret brotherhood handshake?”

9. Caroline: “Stefan, it’s me. That little werewolf slut has lost her mind!”

TVD returns January 17th! I’ll see all you Vamp Fans then 😀

What did you think of this week’s episode of The Vampire Diaries? What was your favorite scene? Favorite line? Did you think Damon would actually breakup with Elena? How will this change Vampire Elena? What about Damon? Who gets all the power now that Klaus killed the sacrificial twelve? Is Creepy Shane a witch? Is Jeremy really cured or is he faking it? Do you like angry Stefan? How will Tyler react knowing Klaus killed his mother and hybrid friends? Tell me in the comments!

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